Lay Off or vacation

As of July 10th my hubby is no longer employed. The company he worked for has been doing layoffs every couple months for the past year. We were hoping that them moving him to another office would spare him from getting the boot, but no. At least he rode it out for almost a year.

So he has been home everyday for almost a month, not complaining I really like him being home. I just don't want to get too used to the idea of him being home, because I know as smart and talented as he is that he WILL find a job, and then he will be gone during the day again!

I just worry about him, I mean is losing a job like a death? He has been all distant and grumpy. I try to make him laugh, I've gotten grumpy with him, nothing seems to help!! I LOVE having him home, I just wish he would get back to his old self again before he finds a job.

Or before I find one! I had a job interview on Tuesday, it went well I think, as good as interviews go. The lady seemed to like me and the fact that I had a degree. So fingers crossed I will hear something in the next couple days about that!!
Then he can be the stay at home daddy, and I can be the bread winner, which will be completely strange after 12 years of the other way around, but I'm looking forward to the idea of that!!

So keep us in your thoughts and I know we will make it to the other side where the rainbows are and the sun is shining!! :D

Dammit I'm going to do it!!

I have considered myself "fat" (not in the good way) for about 11 yrs now (that is how old my baby will be in two months). So I have finally gotten fed up with it!! So long fat girl, here comes the hotness!! This all started about 6 weeks ago, I got an iphone and started playing with all the bazillion apps that you can get for it. Well hubby and I both got the "lose it" app. For the first time I am actually keeping track of what I eat, and I get more exited when I can put in my exercise. What is funny is somehow this little program has made me want to lose it. I started out just wondering what I actually ate during the day and found out that, well I ate to freaking much!! The first two weeks I only put in my food every couple of days cause I think I was scared to see the damage that I had been doing to myself. However the last 4 weeks I have been entering in my food after every meal and snack. I'm startin out slow at a pound a week but so far in 3 weeks I have lost 2.5 pounds. I'm not seeing it on my body but the scale is telling me that it is working. My goal is 100 pound, which will take two years (ugh!!) but I will make it this time I know it!!


this is me and my hunny at Epcot (me at 220 lbs, ugh I hate this picture!) But I have something to look forward to, a thinner healthier me!!! :D
More updates to come!!

More Ice Pics

The Ice Man Cometh

Here are a few pics I took outside while the rain was falling.

Can I skip christmas this year?

For those that know me well, it is a known fact that I am an emotional roller coaster. Most of the time I manage myself well and only a couple people know when I am seriously down.
However this Christmas I would love to just curl up in bed and not get up til the new year. Even then I'm not sure that my moos would perk up any. What really suck is I have nothing to be "depressed" about. I have a wonderful family, whom I love to no end, awesome friends, that put up with my shit, and MOSTLY a FANTASTIC husband that through all the craziness still loves me and tries his hardest to keep me up.
As side from all of that, I am drowning in my own dis pare. Over what? I would like to know that too. I'm tired of feeling like this, up and down every couple months is getting on my nerves. I'm tired of relaying on medication to "fell better or normal". I want to just BE normal.
I take on the emotions of friends and family and can't shake it sometime. A friend recently had a miscarriage, actually her second in a year, and my heart is so tore for her. I have three beautiful children and she has lost two. I have never lost a child but it hurt me to the core to know that she is in such pain. I can't find the words to say to her to tell her my feelings of her pain.
My mom has also be hurting emotionally lately, my grandmother passed away a year ago this week. I am feeling guilty that I was unable to go to the funeral and support my mom like she needed me to. And I was unable to give my goodbyes to my awesome grandma. I think about her all the time and wish she could hug me and let me cry.
Instead I am poring my heart out to the huge thing called the internet in hopes that getting it all out will improve my mood and help me enjoy the holiday, instead of faking my mood.
Going to blow my nose now because I have cried while witting this entire blog post.

Year of a Million ZZZZZZZ's (part 4 of 4,part2)

I had to include this into the Disney trip even though we were "on our way home". We checked out of Disney and decided we needed to go over to Downtown Disney. Shopping, shopping and yes MORE shopping!!! However what did I do I took pictures of cool thing that I saw so here are a few of those.....

Yeah the Lego store was the coolest!! We all loved it!!
After spending a couple hours shopping, we were off. But not leaving Florida just yet!! We decided to cross the state and head to the beach, why?? Well because I figured being so close to the ocean and not going to see it could possibly be a crime. Plus I was hoping to stop my kids from thinking that any lake or pond they saw was the ocean. Show it to them in person and then they would understand just how big the ocean is!!

The ocean was beautiful and fun. The kids LOVED it and did not want to leave but we still had a VERY long drive home, plus the added hours it took to get to the beach, but it was all worth it!!

Year of a Million ZZZZZZZ's (part 4 of 4,part1)

OK so the last day at Disney was to go to Animal Kingdom, what can I say about this. Well it was my least favorite and I could have skipped it all together! In my opinion it was the Disney Zoo, which is not that special. I mean the safari was cool, but that was really the only thing we did because we all wanted to go back to Epcot to see the thing we missed the day before.

We did get tons of pictures of animals but I'm not going to fill my blog up with pictures of animals that are not mine!! LOL
We went off to Epcot, and I got my oldest to ride test track and mission to mars, so I felt it was a productive day!! LOL After Epcot we had one last Character dinner it was with Chef Mickey and Friends.